The scent of urine is everywhere. Walk onto any car of any CTA train and tell me what you smell. 99% of the time it’s going to be someone else’s pee. (The other one percent is generally their body odor or booze.)
I can’t wear outside clothes in my house. Maybe it’s because I live in a less-than-fabulous studio apartment with a day bed that also serves as uncomfortable sofa, but I refuse to sit on said furniture in any item of clothing that has touched a CTA seat, wall, or door frame without subsequent washing. I don’t need you to tell me when and if germs die upon transferring from one inanimate object to another item of clothing – I don’t want that shit where I sleep.
Glistening. My grandmother always said ladies don’t sweat. She clearly did not use public transportation in 90+ degree weather. I don’t know why I bother putting makeup on in the morning.
General humiliation. We were all so excited (a term I use loosely) about the upgrade of CTA stations. Elevators? Escalators? Digital clocks and train statuses? Marble sidewalks? How aesthetically pleasing! You know what isn’t aesthetically pleasing? The bruise on my ass from falling on said sidewalk in the rain.
Missed connections. You may know of my love affair with Craigslist and its Missed Connections. They are without a doubt the greatest piece of literature that the digital age has brought us:
You were waiting on the bus on the north side. I was the black guy in the black car. We exchanged glances and smiles. I should have pulled over to talk to you. Please respond with the streeet [sic] we were on so i [sic] know its you.
You boarded at Merchandise Mart, with red hair and purplish pink fingernails and headphones, on the brown line around 5:15pm headed away from the city. We stood close and exchanged semi-glances until I had to depart. I had on a light blue collared shirt. Would enjoy having a conversion and more eye contact in a non-crowded transport…send me a message.
It’s love! It’s lust! It’s entertainment! It’s never you or anyone you know. (It is pure coincidence that the two CTA-related posts today involve gingers.)